Prop Job
by akaeve
Summary: Tag for Shabbat Shalom. What was it about the thongs?


"I want that locker cleaned out," Director Vance shouted at the team, "And no, it won't wait another day. Get rid of anything that is vaguely useless, in fact ditch everything."

"And what locker would that be?" Ziva asked Tony.

"I think he means the prop cupboard," Tim added, "You know the one we used to put all our undercover gear in. I haven't looked in there for years; in fact I think Kate was the last one to use."

"Oh yes that cupboard," Tony replied smiling, "But who has the key?"

"Last time I looked didn't have," Agent Gibbs shouted as he returned to his desk.

"You have looked in this cupboard?" asked Ziva eying Gibbs suspiciously.

"Nope, not since there was a strange aroma of Vegex emanating from the locker," Gibbs smiled looking at Ziva.

"Vegex?"

"An autolyzed yeast product, not dis-similar to British Marmite or the Australian Vegemite," Tim answered staring at Ziva.

"Well, all I can say is YUKKKKKKKKKK have you tried said products, they are just so gross," Tony shouted across the 'pen, "I mean who could eat such stuff?"

"This vegemite I have heard of, wasn't it mentioned in some song by Men Down Under…"

"Yes Ziva …_I said, "Do you speak-a my language?"He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich," _Ducky began to sing now entering the conversation, "Loved that song, but Jethro you must remember that Marmite was given to the British Army during many overseas campaigns, it was nutritious in ….basically nothing but vitamin B," Dr Mallard continued, "It is said that mosquitos do not like the taste of yeast, and it has been proved if you take Marmite or any said like compound they do not come near you."

"Like yeah Ducks, I mean do you layer it on," Tony asked putting on the actions of one who was smearing sun screen on the body "Or do you eat, 'cos if I were a bug I'd avoid too."

"But going back to the locker what did you find in there?" Ziva now questioned looking at Gibbs.

"Oh I didn't, left it for Stan to sort, he was the probie at the time….."

"Yeah Boss and maybe that's why he requested Agent Afloat status," Tony added.

"You offering DiNozzo? No? Then get that locker emptied now," Vance roared.

"You heard the man," as Gibbs rose and walked to the elevator.

-oOo-

Gibbs returned with a coffee to find the contents of the locker now spewed across Ziva desk.

"So what have we got here?" Tony asked picking up the leather belt. "Now this could come in handy for retraining certain parties."

"Oh yeah, was used in a drugs dust back in '99." Gibbs replied reminiscing.

"That would be the one, before the bust in Baltimore the one that brought us into contact?" Tony smiled.

"Could say that, but who says I wasn't wearing when I met you? You were much more interested in the fact you got a "Navy Cop," Gibbs added.

"Excuse me, getting back to this locker who's were these?" Ziva enquired picking up a pair of thongs and waving them at Tony, "Because I somehow don't think they'll fit any of you, so that makes them Cassidy's?"

"Now those….my little lotus blossom, were used when Kate and I went undercover…" Tony continued, smiling a sly smile.

"She wore these with you?" Ziva questioned in a shocked manner.

"They weren't undercover, undercover they were like undercover, it was the time Fornell died," Tim began to say.

"Fornell died? But we just say him last week. This is getting very confusing," Ziva replied shaking her head.

"We had to get DNA proof, Fornell was being framed as a mole….and we needed to get some Mobsters DNA, so we posed as a lovey dovey couple wanting to know…"

"Yes, they were seeking a paternity test so played the happy couple but, from what I heard from Kate, you played the part really well, you got the earrings in there too Ziva, believe they played a big role in the conversation," Tim interrupted grinning at Tony.

"I see no earrings," Ziva answered.

"Maybe her sister kept them," Tim added.

"Why would Kate's sister, Dr. Cranston, have the earrings?" Ziva continued shaking her head.

"Because Kate accused Tony of sleeping with her sister and Tony replied…" Gibbs now butted in, but looking at Tony who was grinning.

"I said, I thought it was her because the sister was wearing Kate's earrings," DiNozzo laughed realising this was really making things hard for Ziva to understand.

"So you have slept with Dr Cranston as well as Kate, you worry me Tony."

"Ziva," Gibbs began to say gently, "They were arguing, as in make believe, that Tony had slept with Kate's sister so that Kate could or would be given a room away from Tony, she was, and she managed to get photographs of the mobsters DNA, which Abby matched, so you see…."

"Tony did not sleep with either Kate or Rachel?" Ziva now shrugged.

"Yesss…Nooo…no I didn't sleep with either," Tony now shouted.

"Good, so we won't be needing these anymore," as she threw the thongs in the out box.

"Hey," as Tony made a dive to retrieve, "Were you thinking of keeping them, I could buy you a new pair?"

"I do not wish thongs they split you in two, I prefer to go commando," Ziva now slyly smiled looking at Tim.

"Funny, I could have sworn you had big pants on in Paris," Tony now replied.

"Oh yes, but then Tony, I was not so much undercover but working with you," Ziva now laughed.

"Jethro I have to ask," the team heard Dr Mallard say as he from approached from the elevator, "Vance said the prop cupboard," the team turned and looked at Ducky who was now standing next to what looked like an oar or was it a propeller of an aircraft, "How could I have forgotten this."

"Duks, what the hell have you got?" as Gibbs looked at his ME.

"This?" as Ducky held the prop now back at back at arm's length, "This if you remember, came from that case about 11 years ago, the one where the Navy Petty Officer was accidently on purpose beheaded by his aviator, but I think Vance isn't going to be too happy, he told me to remove said propeller which I have done as you can see. I tried to explain that it wouldn't be a very good idea but he insisted….." Ducky continued as he began to smile.

"And?" Gibbs asked.

"The locker fell down, yes the prop was propping the damn thing up, Director Vance is not a happy chappy," as Ducky turned and pointed to the top of the stair.

The team turned and looked at Vance who had a face like thunder but seeing the smiles emerge on the team's faces turned and marched to his office.

The End


End file.
